There's a new girl in town

Original entry: November 4, 2008

Today we were given the rare opportunity to watch a cadaver exchange and delivery from UCSD's willed body program.

Kevin warned us that at some point around 9:30AM, the cadaver of the petite elder woman in the prosectorium was going to be returned to UCSD (minus her pluck) and a new cadaver was going to be exchanged in her place. Our class would be the first to see the new cadaver.

Upon arrival of the cadaver, Kevin called out to the bigger guys in class to help wheel the gurneys in and out of the prosectorium. Jerry and Jared were two of the guys called upon. Kevin said he wanted, "Strapping young men" to assist, and as Jerry walked out with Jared I called to him and said, "Dr. Petti said strapping young men, you don't count!" and Elizabeth yelled at me because she thought I said Jared's name. I told her to pipe down, I was teasing JERRY, not JARED. She let out a nervous laugh.

A couple of minutes later, Kevin walked through the back door with a look on his face that reeked of annoyance along the "oh shit" line, and Jerry and Jared followed with a cadaver that filled the body bag. He invited us all into the prosectorium and the first thing he said was, "She's larger than I thought, and she's also the youngest we've had. She's in her 60s and died of cancer." He's skimming the computerized death certificate. He says to us all, "Let's open up the bag and see what we've got" and at that point several people, Elizabeth included, leave the room. We uncover the plastic on her torso and Kevin says in a dismayed voice, "God, she's fat" and if you could put the sad faced emoticon of :( onto his face, that's what you would have seen. He then patted her leg and said, "But thank you for your donation, you're very generous."

What pissed me off was upon hearing Kevin's exclamation, Elizabeth and one other gal whose name I've since forgotten, both ran in and took a look, as if the cadaver were a spectacle and object of ridicule. Elizabeth pointed to her pubic region and said, "Oh my God what's that?" I know what she meant, and while I thought of it, I didn't actually say it out loud, as some things are better left unsaid. The cadaver had a large mons pubis, and it probably didn't help that there's naturally some bloat in the pubic region associated with embalming. Kevin explained (quite patiently, might I add) that obese people tend to have fat deposits on their pubic region and it's nothing out of the ordinary, that some people deposit fat in certain areas and that's just a matter of genetics. She was still grossed out, but I heard one person whisper to her to be respectful, and she shushed up.

Note: I have nothing against Elizabeth, I think she was a friendly gal and all, but I was just taken aback at the lack of respect towards the donor cadaver. If I am lucky enough to live a long life and die at a ripe old age, too old to donate my organs so that the younger and sick may live, I'd like to bequeath my body to a school that does cadaver dissections to further anatomy students' knowledge (like the program at Miramar) of the wonders that we know as the human body. God forbid somebody laugh at me when I'm pushing 90 and laying cold, stiff, and preserved in a body bag on a table because my tits are sagging. But then again, I'll be dead and I won't care.

Anyway, Kevin went on to discuss how his next Bio232 class was going to have a lot of work cut out for them as far as cleaning her up, getting rid of her adipose tissue so that we could access the musculature and organs to demonstrate to the Bio230 anatomy classes. Jerry and I looked at each other, because that means US.

To be honest I'm not looking forward to being elbow deep in adipose tissue. I have enough fat tissue issues of my own since I gained weight after I quit smoking. I am still not comfortable in my own skin with this extra weight, and often times I find myself off balance and not feeling as if I'm moving quite right. But the real issue is, no matter how well preserved, the smell of adipose and fatty tissue is just revolting, and the truth of it all is that no matter how often you wash up, the smell of the fat tends to stick with you.

I see myself bathing in fresh lemon juice every Tuesday for all of Spring semester 2009. And I don't care who calls me a weenie for doing so, but I *will* wear a mask and do the weenie Vicks VapoRub under the nose trick while I am working on cleaning up the adipose. I will revel in my nerdiness and call myself Queen Weenie, but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.

Double gloving, here I come.